Of Sudden Death

Early morning of last Wednesday (21/01/2015), I got a tweet from my friend saying that my ex-music teacher had passed away due to diabetes and heart attack. 

''Cikgu Khairil dah meninggal''

Boleh dak hang imagine tiba-tiba cikgu hang tak dak. TAK DAK as in disappeared and went to the other side... for real.

All this while, I've never expected that arwah would be gone so soon I mean like tak pernah aku rasa that he was going to die so soon. So soon. Never weh. 

Form 1 aku masuk Asma, masa week of transisi tu, masa last day ada two music teachers. Cikgu Khairil dengan Cikgu Shukrie. Depa la yang briefing on how to sing school song pastu masa assembly lagu apa yang kena nyanyi bla bla bla. Pastu dah settle, they asked us sapa nak masuk music class? Kiranya kelas Muzik ni tak ambik Seni la. I was the girl yang maha la benci subjek SENI. Full of hatred. So I chose lah nak masuk kelas Malaysia. The only class yang offers music and takkan streaming sampai form 3 except for non-Malay yang tak ambik Music.

So tu kira my first official music class. Masa form 1, cikgu Khairil yang ajaq kami semua. Mostly about theories la pastu practical sikit. Form 2 cikgu Shukrie pulak and we learnt gamelan. Pastu form 3, dua-dua cikgu ajaq. 

And waktu form 3 jugak, I joined the orchestra team as a bassist. Masa tu I didn't know a thing about bass guitar kot except for the basic strings lah. The E-A-D-G strings. I mean I knew la kalau E string tu bila first fret tu F pastu second fret F# pastu third fret G and so on. KO GUITARIST TAKKANLAH ITU PON KO TAK TAU?

When I first got the score, aku ni jenis lembab sikit kalau kena baca score. Side reading tu takla cepat sangat sebab first time kan. Aku ni actually dah used to score yang in bass clef sebab I used to play euphonium but masalahnya dulu aku baca as in DO RE MI FA SO LA TI DO not as E F G A B C D E F but tak sampai 3 hari aku dah okay dah main. 

(Arwah memang sakit and diabetes to be precise since aku first masuk and kenai dia. So every time practise orchestra or music class nampak lah abang Jo sent sugarless drink pastu makan ubat dia. His fingers kurus sangat.)

Atas tunjuk ajar cikgu Khairil, aku stay as a bassist sampai lah aku form 5. Dari lagu senang to moderate to susah. Dari aku tak active in music kat sekolah to Puisi & Lagu to my heartache sebab kena ditched cus the rule for competition nak 6 people pulak bukan 7 like always. Semualah! He was responsible for it.

But now, he's gone.

He's gone for real, people. 

He's gone.

I'm devastated to know that I didn't get the chance to apologise and thank him properly. Surely I did during Majlis Mohon Restu but this is different.

RIP cikgu Khairil aka cikgu Ayen aka cikgu Dragon aka cikgu Keirel.

Thank you for everything.

Starting from now, insyaAllah I will cherish everyone be it family or friends or even my teachers before they 'go'.  


Al-Fatihah cikgu Khairil Fauzi bin Ali. You will be remembered.


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