I am an introvert?

July 23, 2016





Recently, I've been avoiding people (it's not because I'm mad at them or anything. It's just I am currently in the mood of not-having-the-mood-to-communicate-with-people) and all SocMeds that I have. It feels good and so refreshing. You don't have to see such drama and petty things but ah ah I didn't miss #KimExposeTaylorParty though but I didn't say anything about it. I mean I am a fan of neither so why should I bother and say anything? I mean like helloooooooooo I'm freaking Adele duhhh *rolls eyes*. Scratch that a-ha, I wanna talk about INTROVERT and EXTROVERT.

Well to start off, I read some things about Introvert and Extrovert.

I always thought that I'm an extrovert most of the time. But that's just because I don't understand what does it take to be an extrovert for real. What I know is, EXTROVERT = LOUD and not shy to struck a conversation and things like that. I could say that I'm loud but I'm not shy to struck a conversation but I do when I want to; when I travel I always sit with another traveler and I really enjoyed talking to them. Hey Terry! Hey Edward! Hey Demi! Yeap those are my new friends from my last trip to Vietnam aha. But then, when I'm back in Malaysia or anywhere else here, I just don't. I'd rather talk to my books instead of talking to people not because I'm shy or anything, people drain me out somehow. Maybe that's why people are somehow get quite intimidated of me plus with my resting bitch face. What more can I say? 

Well guess what, I was wrong! I am SOMEHOW an extrovert and not all.

On the other hand, I've never thought that I am an introvert. From what I know, introvert is always recluse and quiet. But wait-a-minute, I am actually recluse and quiet. I enjoy solitude. Most of the time, I'm quiet around family that they think I don't talk much but lol I ridiculously talk a lot with my friends. Haha DID sucks somewhat. Yeap I have DID/MPD that not everyone knows. 

What I'm about to write is taken from Maria Elena's blog. You can read them as well at hers.

Introvert :
  1. Them being alone does not mean they're lonely. They're enjoying time away from physical interaction with people.
  2. They are not emotional (publicly). So don't expect them to cry over things you're crying over. They feel things, but just not expressive.
  3. Publicly, they can be awkward or normal. If they're not in the mood, they're probably just stand in a group but seriously not listening to a word. If they are, they can talk and join in the conversation.
  4. They're good at pretending they're listening (most likely for adults)
  5. If they like doing something, they will do it alone. Like playing games, travelling, watching movies, etc etc. So takyah terasa if you're left out.
  6. They don't care about what others think. Because they're introvert. So most likely, their inner voice is super loud that it can cover the noise around them.
  7. They can be reasoned with, so don't think that introverts are selfish.
  8. The can achieve stuff on their own. Like studying for exams.

Extrovert :
  1. They're not necessarily loud. They just have a lot to talk about and express that they probably couldn't hear themseleves because the osund of their brain working to find files and datas in the memory folders were too loud.
  2. They really do feed off the energy of others.
  3. They like socialising because of point 2. Therefore, they like to do things in groups, like travelling, watching movies, etc etc.
  4. They understand and learn better in study groups (groups la in general) because discussions open their minds.
  5. They're not necessarily happy go lucky. She met several angry extroverts and they're comfortable talking about their feelings and thoughts.
  6. The're able to struck a conversation with anyone. But, it depends on their mood. Once dah masuk gear, susah nak stop.
  7. They can make people feel like they know each other very well. Or they are socially awkward.
  8. They probably have inner voices. And their inner voices talk over each other. That's probably why you've met people who talk fast and a lot in a short period.
So, what I can conclude is;

a -- the INTROVERT

I can definitely say that, they are totally relatable to me for real. I'm not even kidding.


b -- the EXTROVERT

Technically, MOST of them are not relatable and SOME part are.

c -- I thought that I am an introvert because the logics are :


1- Them being alone does not mean they're lonely. They're enjoying time away from physical interaction with people.

 I love being alone most of the time. I find it very soothing and refreshing.


2 - They are not emotional (publicly). So don't expect them to cry over things you're crying over. They feel things, but just not expressive.

I don't publicly go emotional. Well some might say that I do get emotional in public, but sorry mate that's just Twitter *smirks*. SocMeds and real life are different.


3 - Publicly, they can be awkward or normal. If they're not in the mood, they're probably just stand in a group but seriously not listening to a word. If they are, they can talk and join in the conversation.

Everything is true.


4 - They're good at pretending they're listening (most likely for adults)

YEAP! I actually can get zoned out for real.


5 - If they like doing something, they will do it alone. Like playing games, travelling, watching movies, etc etc. So takyah terasa if you're left out.

I enjoy travelling alone let alone other things. Sometimes, I go out alone to movies.


6 - They don't care about what others think. Because they're introvert. So most likely, their inner voice is super loud that it can cover the noise around them.

Need I say more?


7 - They can be reasoned with, so don't think that introverts are selfish.

For a fact, I admit that  I can be so selfish at times, but still..... I can be reasoned with.


8 - They can achieve stuff on their own. Like studying for exams.

  To be honest, I'm not a fan of study group let alone study with anybody else. The gist is; more than one person. But if I do, that's me being thoughtful and TRYING not to hurt her/his feelings.



But one particular blog post didn't sufficient for me. So, I ran Google. Read extensive articles on both introvert and extrovert. First, I'm gonna start with introversion. 


In this post :
  1. Function better when working alone --- ABSOLUTELY
  2. Being quiet doesn't mean 'having nothing to say' --- I have so much that I keep quiet.
  3. Going out in a coffee shop with book, work, music. --- I tell you it's very satisfying.
  4. Introverts choose who they connect with very carefully --- I don't open up easily.
  5. Rainy days at home are blessings --- Somehow yeah.
  6. A trip alone to a foreign country or another city is not scary --- SO FRIGGING TRUE.
  7. You can never comprehend how some people can spend the entirety of their day together, even fresh lovers in their honeymoon phase. Space is healthy. Silence is necessary --- I don't understand how people can be so clingy?????????
  8. Time alone means time for introspection --- yup
  9.  Observer in the group --- always
  10. A very likeable person --- I don't know?
  11. Spending less time socialising means coming up with so many more things to occupy your time --- like duh exactly. I can read, tv shows marathon and God knows things that I do.
  12. That moment when you finally come home after a large party is like the first breath of air in a long time, and a great relief --- yup
  13. It can be funny, interesting, and a little bit sad when people get surprised that you have so many interests and hobbies. "Oh my God, I had no idea you did so much!" I mean, it's not like I sit and stare at my ceiling when I am not with people. But your surprise entertains me --- yup
  14. Socialising can be draining, but an introvert can love spending time with an extrovert. Opposites do attract, and one fulfills the other. There are things an introvert cannot do without an extrovert, and vice versa --- ohh yeah man!

Moving on to Huffington Post :

(Anyway, I just choose some points because some are quite the same as above)
  1. Go to parties but not to meet people --- sometimes
  2. Often feel alone in a crowd --- always man always =')
  3. Networking makes you feel like a phony --- Yeappp that it's so fake I wanna puke
  4. Been called "too intense" --- I always get "you have no chill" over texts. Yeap I'm only expressive behinds texts or any other medium of writing
  5. Downtime doesn't feel unproductive --- I need time alone to recharge my battery
  6. On the subway, tend to sit at the end of the bench not in the middle --- not really. 
  7. Start to shut down after being active for too long --- currently doing it and yeap, again
  8. You screen all your calls, even from friends --- currently doing it and yeap, again
  9. Notice details that others don't --- yea
  10. Constantly have running inner monologue --- yeah and it's insane
  11. A writer --- maybe that's why I tend to get emotional over writings and calm outside

Then, extroversion.

I said that I am somehow extrovert right. So let's see.

  1. People often assume you're flirting --- sometimes that's what annoys me the most. I'm just being friendly.
  2. You're not allowed to be sad --- as a heartless person which everyone knows that I am, if I started getting sad and all crack, they wouldn't really care which obviously saddens me but then I feel nothing. It's a 50-50 situation.
  3. You're expected to keep the conversation going --- this happened when I was texting with my sort-of-special-friend back then which is lol 
  4. Craving the company of others --- sometimes this is what I feel but I kinda wanna be alone

AND you can read other reasons of being an extrovert here :


Have you read? Good! Now, let's proceed to the final of this post.


THERE!

I am definitely an introvert right?
But then, I wanted to make sure that I was, sooooo I took a quiz online from Quiet Revolution. The results were as I expected........

Oh wait-a-minute, I did not actually expect that I was fully introvert. I expected that I was in the middle of introvert-extrovert spectrum which was..... RIGHT man.

I am an AMBIVERT instead.

Ambivert means I fall smack in the middle of the introvert-extrovert spectrum. In many ways, I have the best of both worlds, able to tap into the strengths of both introverts and extroverts as needed.



No, actually, I am an ambiverted introvert. I am an ambivert with a strong introversion.

I knew it! I always fall in the middle of a spectrum. Did I tell you that I am both left-and-right brained?

No? Well, that has to be another post.

Till then!


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